Strangled in Lace and Tulle

I now pronounce you
stripped of your name
strangled in lace and tulle,
veiled so you can't see what you're getting into
until death or divorce does you part
or a dozen screaming infants does you in
or maybe being pronounced man and wife
just doesn't make sense anymore
cuz nobody anywhere gets pronounced
woman and husband
i now say i do i will
but i don't
cuz i won't promise
to honor and obey
until my hair is grey and my teeth are falling out
cuz that sounds like indentured servitude to me
and didn't we outlaw slavery a century or two ago
but no, here i am branded, banded by a slip of gold
and what do i want with a priest telling me that my union is blessed
when he tells me my girlfriend and i are eternally damned
and you may kiss the bride
not you may kiss the husband
cuz you know this is a contract between men
the father handing you off to the husband holding you in
to a union ruled by a priest or a pope
and a license signed by a justice of the peace
and is it any wonder your mother is weeping?

--Ariana Waynes, 10/24/98